Resist Devolution: Write a Thank-You Note!

Yes, it's still customary to write a thank-you note. In fact, it's still expected. I realize I may be old-fashioned in my opinion on this, but I believe we should resist the devolution of humanity. In this age of e- and i- EVERYTHING, we are forgetting how to actually communicate and connect with each other. It's causing us to devolve--to go backward to a more primitive state, at least as far as interpersonal connection and socialization are concerned.

I was taught that a thank-you note is always appropriate, even if it's extremely late, or if it's in reference to the smallest thing. And no, a hastily typed, impersonal e-mail is not sufficient. If someone took the time and effort (or money) to do something special for you, buy you a gift, or otherwise show you their love, the very least you can do is to sit down with a pen and a piece of paper or a card and SAY THANK YOU. Yes, that will require a stamp. Yes, that will require some thought. And yes, that will require five to ten minutes of your time. It's really not that hard.

I have been really surprised at the lack of "thankfulness" I have witness lately. I attended a wedding nearly 14 months ago and ordered a gift from the couple's online Target registry to be shipped directly to their home...two weeks before their wedding. I have yet to receive a simple thank you from them. That is inexcusable. In the months since then, I can count at least six other instances where I did something special for someone in need or gave a gift and have not been sent a note of thanks. Several of these instances included home-cooked meals for friends or acquaintances who were either ill, had a sick family member, or were in some other crisis situation. I can understand a delay of a few weeks or even months, depending on how severe the situation, but at some point a proper thank you is expected. Now don't misunderstand me. I have not done these things only to get a self-serving pat on the back; I truly did them to be helpful. Lord knows I've needed help from my friends and family at times too, so I know how important it is. It has just recently occurred to me (as I was sitting down to write a note of thanks to a friend who helped me out the other day) that I have never heard from those people. As I thought more about it, I realized that no one really does it anymore. Not even most of my own family. And that has made me sad.

Now I'm teaching my Mini Maven how to properly say thanks to those who bless him. He just recently finished hand-writing his own thank-you notes to 16 different people. That's a lot for a just-turned-eight-year-old! But it's a valuable lesson he needs to learn. He worked on writing two to three notes every day after school, and by the end, he was doing beautifully; he seemed to have gotten a knack for what to say from his heart, and his handwriting had improved immensely. It's a win all around, I say.

If someone has done something special for you lately, write a note to thank them. I promise it will NEVER hurt, and it will only cost you a few minutes, a small piece of paper (you don't even have to have preprinted, fancy note cards), and a stamp. It's never wrong to say "thank you." And it's never too late, either. One exception to this rule is for mutually exchanged gifts. I have to point out one particular family member of mine--she writes a thank-you note for EVERYTHING, including Christmas gifts, even though she gives us gifts as well. Where Christmas gifts are concerned, when they're mutually exchanged, a thank-you note is not required. But it doesn't hurt either! Be thankful!